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SHOPPING AND SPENDING
The act of spending money creates in some the same high that thrill seekers and risk takers experience. Risk takers put their lives on the line time and time again. Compulsive shoppers and spenders do a similar behaviour in that they put their financial reputation on the line. They are unaware that not all of society has the same patterns of spending. Buying for the sake of spending offers a sense of control and fantasy. Compulsion and obsession become behaviours that define addiction.
Spending is out of control. It becomes a thing of secrecy, moneys get borrowed, credit cards are maxed, bills go unpaid and lies get told. Shame and guilt become constant companions and fear of discovery haunts the addict at every turn. Often purchases are useless items and hidden, put away and never used.
Like other addictions, this one is no less critical in nature than other addictions. Remorse plays a large part in all addictions. Eating, sex, shopping and cyberism are things that must be dealt with so the individual can come to a point that normal living can be resumed. These activities are not things that can be stopped on a permanent basis; they are essential to life. Shopping is a necessary activity; it must be done in order to sustain life.
Through awareness of oneself and the reasoning behind our behaviours we are able to gently move ourselves back into healthy ways of living. Many people are reluctant to believe that such an addiction exists. Just ask the person who has claimed bankruptcy for the second time, the broken relationships due to an out of control spending/shopping problem. And what about the person contemplating suicide because the have no where to turn for help?
The following questions are here to help you determine if
your spending and shopping patterns are taking you to places you would not
like to go:
- Have you ever asked yourself why you buy things you don't need?
- Have you ever spent money for bills on things for yourself?
- Have you stolen money from a friend, family member, employer or place
of business?
- Do you start out thinking that you deserve a reward and then end up feeling
shame and
guilt?
- Does your spending cause strife between yourself and a significant other?
- Do you go shopping to change your mood?
- Do you shop when you are depressed?
- Do you shop when you are happy and then become depressed?
- Have you ever maxed out your credit cards?
- Have you ever used one credit card to pay the bill of another?
- Do you shop to impress others?
- Do you hide things that you buy from others?
- Do you give things away to others to help relieve the pain caused by
spending?
- Have you ever sought help for a spending/shopping problem?
- Have you ever wished your life was different?
If you need assistance, seek further information on EFT and ERT.
Emotional Freedom Techniques and Emotional Release Therapy can be beneficial in helping to overcome addictions. Nutrition also plays a part in your recovery.
For a free 15 minute consultation contact:
Kallie P. Miller, R.N., EFT-CC, 1-519-471-6234. London, Canada.
Both of these techniques may be facilitated over the telephone.
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